10/17/2009

What's so bad about assumptions? (deadline: 10/22, 12 p.m.)

In "Our Friend Judith," Doris Lessing makes us see how limited those stereotypical assumptions could be if we apply them to understand Judith, who is in fact a complicated character and differs from the idea of "spinster" assumed by people who deem the unmarried status as a kind of abnormality. You have the following two options to answer my question:
1) From the story, we know that it is not good to assume anything about anyone but we all do it and sometimes when people make assumptions they tend to harbor wrong thoughts in their minds or even to say rude comments. Therefore in our society we have so many prejudices, bigotries, discrimations based on wrong assumptions about people of different (racial, class, gender, sexual orientation, marital) status. Can you come up with any concrete examples?

2) Do people make assumptions about you based on certain "stereotypes"? What is it poeple think about you that is completely false?

29 comments:

Clair said...

I want to answer question number two.
People always think I’m wayward person who I’m really not. Actually, I hate that kind of people most. How can I bear myself to become one of them? I always think people shouldn’t bother others in anyway. And as a human, we should be responsible. I didn’t understand how come they misunderstand me. But sooner I just got the answers. I’m braver than others, which means I’m not afraid to resist things I think are wrong. This violate Confucian who think endures patiently is the moral excellence. They maybe think I’m too mean to put up with others’ little errors. But the truth is I just want to do things right. And since I’m already mean how can they expect I’m an easy-going girl? Braving express my own opinion does not mean I am wayward!  

Frank said...

I think I'll go with the first one.

One of my uncles told me about this from his personal experience.

When he was still a student in an elementary school, he had to write an essay each week.
One day, he wrote an essay which he felt was very good and could get him good grade.
Unfortunately, his teacher gave him a zero instead.
The teacher thought that he plagiarized from some magazine because he felt that his essay wasn't something that elementary school students could handle and demanded him to show proofs that he didn’t plagiarize from anything.
Same thing happened when he was in university.
He took a calculus course and one day he was having some quiz in the class.
He couldn't figure out a question, he thought the solution to it was too complicated. Suddenly, he “invented” some way which was easier to figure the question out.
Then again, the question was marked with a big red X on it.
He asked his professor for the reason, and again, the professor considered his “new formula” as plagiarizing from somewhere else.
Years had passed. He faced the same situation for the third time, except that he was a professor himself in USA by then.
He was examining a student’s thesis, and he found the thesis creative and interesting. Yet he was afraid that the student might have plagiarized from somebody else’s work.
He went to library and searched to see if there was anything similar to that, but he couldn’t find a clue.
He then asked one of his colleagues about this and his colleague was a bit surprised at what he asked.
The colleague said:” You can never say your student plagiarize from someone else if you can’t prove that. Your student doesn’t have the responsibility to prove anything. I think this is common sense and yet you ask about such thing. Don’t you think it’s strange!? ”

Based on my uncle’s story, I realize that so many people tend to put their thoughts and options on others so many times. They would consider some people as being wrong if those people don’t follow their “rules”. At the end, such a tendency like this has caused so many prejudices and assumptions.

Eva said...

I'll take a couple of examples based on my observation.
Girls spend much more time dressing up themselves than boys do.
There are many girls who look shiny and dressed up well every day, even during the final exams.
I wonder that it must cost them much time to get dressed up, so they must have little time and concentration to study.
But when I found out one of my classmates who gets really good grades and still looks good every day,
I immediately changed my original opinion about shiny girls don't study.

Another example is me.
People who didn't know me much often think of me as a serious and boring person, especially when they know that I'm a Taurus.
Maybe it's because that I act shy and tend to hide the funny part of me when facing new people and different environment.

However, when they get to know me a little bit more, they realize that I laugh a lot and sometimes speak humorously; some of them even say that I don't look like a Taurus at all.

Although these examples about assumptions don't cause damages, there are many other examples that include wrong thoughts, discrimination, bigotries.

We should avoid using these wrong and subjective perspectives to assume people we don't really know
because we don't want to be misunderstood, either.

Zenobia said...

I'll take number two.

I'm a dark girl, and my eyes are as bigger as the aboriginals; thus, I'm often consideres the one of them. Even they know I'm not the one, they still associate me with aborginals. For me, it's okay to be like an aboriginal; however, it really bothers me sometimes.

Firt of all, some people would think I must be a master of sports, for aboriginals exercise excellently. Besides, they may consider I must have a good voice. Actually, I'm only good at playing volleyball, and I'm out off tune! If I told them the fact, they often asked surprisingly " How could it be possible? You should own the talents, for you're like an aborginal!"

In addition, I'm the top 3 in my class. Once I refues to attend an extracurricular activity because of being lazy or not interested in, some people will say, " Why? Study again? ", or some will start teaching me by saying, " Studying is not the only thing you can do! " It sounds really uncomfortable! I think they consider me as a bookworm! I hate being a bookworm! Therefore, I don't dare to refuse to attend an activity which I think it's boring. And I have to try to look happy lest some will murmur.

Vickie said...

I’d like to answer question No.2.

People don’t know me always assume me as a hard-working and don’t-like-to-play girl possibly base on my (once) white skin and the glasses I seldom takes off. When they initially talk with me, they assume me as can’t make any decision, and probably take my parents’ as mine.

First of all, I’m not a studious person until encountering the entrance exam, and the circumstance of my change was simply because I asked my parents to register a fancy cram school for the exam and I had to take the responsibility of it. Speaking of my interest of recreation, if they have my blog ID, they’ll find that I usually renew it. Actually, I am one of very few classmates who post articles on the BBS.

Appearance can really let us mistake a person as totally different one. As for me, my white skin come from my mother’s, and I can’t take the glasses off me just because I am allergic to ashes so that I can’t wear contact lenses.

Furthermore, I always shy at a stranger. If they get along with me, they’ll probably wish they didn’t have ears. And, if they become my intimate friend, they‘ll find out I really have my own opinions about things around me. In my rebel time, around high school, I always let my parents headache. I just wanted to fight with every decision they made.

Because of that, I clearly know how my appearance and my shyness cheating others. Judith didn’t care of it, but I do. So that’s why I choose this one to answer:)

jessie said...

I think I will answer the question one.
In anterior age, the people often have bias on gender,especially in Asian society.Everybody knows that ancient chinese society is a typical patriachy.Woman do not have any power or right in acient time.Because the traditional chinese society is based on agriculture,the value of man become more and more important.This is unfair.Woman should have her own value in the society.I think that the acient people can not deny the importance of woman who just have less power naturally.

Joanne said...

i want to answer question number one.


people always think girls must love to play doll and love the color like pink,red and orange boys all need to be brave and loves to play robots and like the color blue black and green.
If a boy likes the color pink and loves to play doll.That boy usually
foreclose by his peers and has innuendo nickname.But why boys and girls need to follow this stereotype? Does all this thing is correct? In my opinion,stereotype is a obstacle that disturb social developement.If people want to live a bettter life,to shed those stereotype must be the important thing to let our life to become better.

elmo said...

I believe this question has been discussing for such a long time and people talked about different examples in last year's classes. In my opinion, African-American being discriminated is the most serious stereotype in this society. Take a film "Crush" we've seen in class for instance, black men were thought to be criminals everytime when a crime happens. people come up with a thought as "This must be done by a black." Such things show enormous and serious discrimination which is the stereotype we're talking about right now. Even they did nothing or being a so nice person, they're still guilty in someway. That is a pretty prominent example. By the way, I've even heard a saying that Asian-American are having even lower social status in the US, I don't know whether it is true or not. I heard that from my aunt and cousin, they've been moving to America for years.

Grace Wang said...

2) Let me tell you how people think about me (well, most of the people, not all of them). I`m a pastor`s daughter, so people usually think that I`m prim. A pastor is usually connected with serious and old fashion. So people who don`t know me too much will think that I`m not easy to be with. A pastor can be both serious and humorous. My father and I are good friends, we like to talk and share our thoughts. Some people think that I`m controlled by the religious concepts, so I`m not allowed to drink alcohol, conservative or something else that people think Christian can`t do. I have to say that this is not what I am. In sum, I like to make friends with different kinds of people and have a good relationship with them, so let us be friends!

Annie Chien said...

I'd like to answer question number one.

Some people in Taiwan always think that good looking girls or handsome boys usually have a lot of boyfriends or girl friends,they won't pay their true love during a relationship and they like to go to parties or night clubs with others.Moreover,if students who also have good lookings(who cares about their appearences,hair styles or dressing styles) people (teachers or classmates)will think that they are not good students or they won't have good grades because they spend too much time on their appearances to make themselves become a beautiful or cool person that they will not have enough time to study.

However,I think that is not true.I know lots of good looking girls and boys who are also very good students and have good grades.All of them have faith in something such as religions like "god" that they will learn to know what love is and how to love a person.Then they won't have complicated relationships.And my friends who care about how they look like just want to be in a good mood and be polite(to show their respect) and they always study very hard.

Therefore, I think we can't judge a person by his or her appearance just like we can't judge a book by its cover to know that it's a good book or bad book,we need to read it or try to understand that person first.

Emily said...

I'm going to answer the second question.
My friends told me that the first time they saw me,they saw me as a serious and boring person! I think that's probably because when I go into an unfamiliar environment,I tend to be quiet and I don't really wear a smile on my face. I'm quiet not because that I don't want to talk to people,it's because I don't know how to start a conversation. But when people come up and talk to me,I just feel really happy about it,and I always try my best to make good conversations with them.

Almost all my friends thought that I was an old-fashioned,serious,and boring person the first time they met me. But they all said that when they got to know me more,they didn't think so anymore. They started to think that I'm easy-going,and can be pretty funny sometimes. I think it just takes time for people to really get to know me,that's all. So,you can take your time to get to know me,I'm sure that I'm not as boring and serious as you think I am!

tony said...

I want to answer question number one.There are a lot of Mechanical impression.
For example:When i was a kid,my dad always told me"You can not cry,because you are a boy".If a boy cry loudly,he will laught by people...."sissy,good for nothing so forth"....it's a typical Stereotype .I feel very confuse.Both of us are human,why can't boys be sad.They need to pretend they are brave??
I think Because of the traditional social.Man needs to go out for work,they need to be strong and guts.Feeble men always look down by people.No matter past,now,even future.

Sandy said...

I’d like to answer the second question.
At school, I seldom chat with classmates because I sometimes think their conversations are meaningless or feel wasting time to do nothing together. But I don't mean I hate to make friends with others, I just need more private spaces for my own. I join several activities which I really interested in, unlike others, I don't always follow with friends every time, so many friends think I'm a quiet, inactive and self-centered person in their first impressions.
In contrast, I'm a talkactive and I'd like to do something with craze and excitment. Besides, I am enthusiastic about helping others when they are in predicaments. After they know me a lots, they trust me very much and like to share their feelings with me. Although many people make assumptions about me, I still believe that someone who really wants to know me will be my permanent friends.

Sue said...

I choose to answer the first question.

There are many wrong assumptions about people in the world, and I want to talk about marital status assumption. In our Taiwanese typical family, it is easy to discover that women are believed to do the house working, cook three meals, and take care of family even if they have jobs. However, men with working identities are supposed not to do all above. “Why can not men and women have equal status in their marriage?” I wonder. Maybe it is because the stereotype that restrains us to change. If so, why don’t we break this stereotype now?

Emma said...

This is a controversial issue for a long time and in order to change this status, many people did many things. But, the stereotypes just rooted in everybody’s mind and became worse than early days. On the “English and Contemporary culture” this class, I had read some essays that is talking about racial discrimination. One of the essays impressed me the most, because that essay mentioned some example about white people's attitude towards brown people. In that story, a white people were on the airplane and next to him were a brown people (maybe from the Middle East). At that time, that white people requested to change another flight because he felt nervous when brown people on the same plane that he took. I can understand their mood after 911 event but I think this man’s reaction to brown people just too over. There are still lots of good people in the Middle East. We shouldn’t put stereotype on any color of people just because their race.

Fatima said...

I'm gonna answer question 1.
Obviously, though now is 21 century, there's still lots of unfair things around us. I think the most impressed one for people might be the discrimination of races. It's a big problem of western country. But
when I went to a meeting of high school student, the topic we talked about was " the vision from Taipei to the world and from world to Taipei". There was a big issue that we always subconsciously adore western people while some kinds of prejudice against people who are black or yellow. In my opinion, it might bacause of the medias in our life and our vision of utilitarianism (that if someone has money, he gets the higher level). Of course, I didn't mean all of the people. And we may sometimes see American or European discover somethings that help the earth on TV, while people in eastern southern Asian or African or even South American might fight with themselves in their country... some bad or brutal events.
But it's still getting better now, for the rising of democracy, and also the rising of the countries which might not have stronger power before, like India or Thailand...

Bunny said...

I’d like to answer question number two.
Actually, I faced the problems that most of my friends, they thought my clothing was like a man or a boy because I always wore jeans and pants. I didn’t want to wear skirts since I graduated from Junior High, also, I didn’t have any laced style clothes. In fact, I preferred to wear T-shirts and jeans because I considered this is the most comfortable style for me, but my friends they always wanted to change my thoughts and persuaded me to wear like them, such as wearing some sexy clothes.

Moreover, every time when they saw me, they judged my clothes and even called me “man” as my nickname.

Hence, I think it is really an unfair attitude to me because in nowadays society, many girls like to dress up themselves neutrally. Besides, some young boys in Japan, they wear skirts to make their fashion style. So, I want to break the stereotype and insist on my style.

Joyce said...

I want to answer question one.
My friends told me that they thought I am a serious person because I wore eyeglasses and had little smile. But after they got along with me, they found that they are completely wrong. Actually, I am vigorous and hard to be serious. Sometimes, I am a little befuddled. I think maybe the nervousness which I had when I get along with someone don’t familiar with.
I think it is inevitably for us to assume something about anyone or anything because we have our own experience and judgment. But I think what the people is should pass through the daily life.

Sophia said...

I want to answer question number one.
In my opinion, it is really not good to define others by their first impression.I have a personal experience to prove this. One of my best friends, she went to a Chinese composition class same as me in the cram school. Owing to a lot of students wanted teacher to correct their composition, the teacher just corrected in a fast speed way. I thought due to the time limit, the teacher couldn’t spend much times on every students composition carefully. Unfortunately, my friend and I lined up in the end of the line so the teacher gave us a score in the haste. I thought the standard of grading was according to the neatly writing and the space of the paper clean. However, my friend was not good at writing words neately. The score really gave a bit shot on her confidence.
No matter which colors or social status people we met in our life we just can’t judge them by the first impression or give comments on them in a random way. We need to make contact in them and know what they feel inside their heart. Just like a good composition can’t be judge by its cover.

Janet Chang:) said...

I would like to answer question one.

We sometimes follow the assumptions made by people we deeply trust or admire. We thought that certain actions would finally lead to a fixed ending because to trust is always much easier than to think critically.When in junior and senior high school, students were restricted by the regulations which limited our clothing, hairstyles, and the length of skirts as well as socks. The students who didn’t follow these regulations would be simply considered bad students.

This revealed that there were still old-fashioned thoughts left in our sub consciousness, controlling our assumptions of one’s behavior. I think that it’s pretty satire because the main purpose of going to school is to acquire knowledge. I don’t know why we should pay so much attention on our clothing and appearance. I don’t really think that obeying these stipulations would improve our learning ability. In other words, I see it as a policy which was designed to restrain students’ thinking of clothing and avoid creative thinking.

In conclusion, stereotype is, in my opinion, a tool which intentionally makes people believe and think in the same way as the governors do. Then, it makes maintain the ordering easier. Everything is peaceful but just on the surface indeed.

Amy said...

The issue about assumptions,I think of the famous story "Pride and Prejudice".In the beginging of the story,due to others assumptins, the heroine Elizabeth
also has Prejudice to Mr. Darcy .
Because of that,even they don't know each other, Elizabeth doesn't like him.Beside this story about assumptions,I have the experience.
When I was in junior high,one day there is a transfer student in my class.When he made introduce to himself,he looks so series,amd no laugh.Therefore,we thought maybe he is not a good person to get along with,and none of us to talk with him.We didn't talk to him unless once the teacher grouped us in a team to do a report.Then,we
had a discussion about ouer report.From then on,I still found that he is an active,and humorous person.The reason thathe looks so fierce is that he is so nervous in a new circumstance.
Through this experience,I think that assumptions is really a terrible thing,and we shouldn't judge other people by this,its
superficial and unwise movement.

Teresa said...

1)I prefer to answer the first question.
Taiwanese always frown when it comes to foreign laborers or foreign brides from undeveloped countries. Although media and government have promoted to respect different culture and human rights, poeple do not agree with those new immigrant. When somebody mentions them, the most public would use some words to describe those foreigners, such as noisy talking, philistine, without enough education, even dirty. In fact, many foriegn laborers and immigant have college degree inthier own country, and they are able to speak more than two or three languages. Most people in nowadays society still have a severe discrimination and rooted stereotype to them. I learned it from the dialogue between different people. One day, I talk about the issue of foriegn laborers with my best friend, she thought they should not come here to disturb our society.
why do we not to turn this phenomenon to positive. Maybe we can improve our thinking and society from learning different culture. We should make self-examination instead of discrimination.

Kelly said...

We always follow the assumptions that made by the ancient people.They just think that it is true.Is it really true?Just like me,most of the people thaink that I am very cool.I don't lke to speak to the others.I just proud of myself and look down on the others.I sometimes talk very loudly so they will think that I am not friendly and think that I am punishing them.It is absolutely wrong.I like chatting with others.I don't speak anything that is baceuse I am not familiar with the others.When I familiar with them, I will be the one that talk the most.I talk very loudly not because I am punishing them.It is because I am very happy or I worry that they can't hear me.I like to make friends with others so I won't treat them bad.
I think that the assumption is umfair to the one that is not just they think.You don't like the others have assumptions to you.The others are the same!

Vivian Tu said...

I have a friend who grew up in a traditional family which emphasized on boy’s importance very much. So she always got less attention and care from her parents just because she was a girl. Her parents thought girls can do no contribution to a family so always treated her badly, even tried to abandon her when she was a baby. This kind of discrimination toward girls affected her deeply. She hated her little bother who was obviously a spoiled child and took care of everything by herself. She became very independent, but also insecure about the relationship between people. And sometimes I could feel that insecurity while getting a long with her. She could hardly trust people who tried to build close relationship with her.
Basing on my friend’s experience, I understand how straggle it is for a girl to grow up in such traditional family. This discrimination roots from the difference between man and woman in the past. But our society has totally changed, women can have the same ability as men, as long as people stop looking down on them.

Ronny said...

Is the stereotype a good thing or bad thing? If we sometimes take it seriously, the stereotype is a bad thing. Even it will hurt someone severely. Otherwise, we have a positive attitude to the stereotype; it does make him or her strong.
From the past to nowadays, our parents always ask us to make those who excel in every subject with friends and decline invitations from those who are not good at studies. Usually some those who have good performances on studies are marked as good students; while others are singed as bad students. However, is it a correct thought? Definitely not. Actually, we should judge by ourselves. Some of those who are clever at studies are cunning or have bad tempers. They mostly hide this and do not show out. Therefore we should not learn to judge a person by his or her appearances but his or her minds.
I am a boy so everyone expects that I can act how a normal boy does. But I do not like it. Why do I not act like a girl? Is it illegal and will I be put on jails? I am what I behave. No one can interfere my behaviour and thoughts. I am just myself and I love myself. So when people laugh at me, I will scold them severely and tell them not to do that again. It is because it is too harmful and childish.

Erica said...

I want to answer the question number one.

I don't know why girls should be tender,soft and elegent.On the contray,if boys be rude or misbehaviour,seldom people will consure them.In fact,most people even think it is moral for boys.Although the society atmosphere has changed a lot from past,boys and girls become more even.However,many people still have the traditional thinking.As far as I am concerned,woman have the ability to deal the things well.No matter what others thinks,in my opinion girls and boys also shouid be courtesy,not only for girls.

Jude said...

I think those stereotypical assumption come from for some reasons, although it is not exactly true. Take sexual for example, it is traditional considered that woman should be stay at home, take care of housework and suckle their children. That was because man is usually born nature stronger than woman; they can go out off door and hunt some meat for their family to eat. The division work make the benefit increased efficiently. However, it doesn’t mean that man already win the power to control the whole benefit. To sum up, if we could clarify those stereotype’s origins, those stereotypical assumption would be no longer exist.

Cleon said...

I would like to answer the first quastion.

There are lots of stereotypes in our daily lives. The first image came to my mind is the steretypes we add on the abriginal people.

In this steretype, we consider the abriginal people to be only good at singing and sports. And it's not only happening in Taiwan, in truth, it's happening all around the world.

But the stereotypes might hurt people's felling or even influence their judgements on theirselves.
There are lots of people who are suffering because of the stereotypes. Many decided forcing themselves to do things that are really hard for them, just because of the pressures from stereotypes.

It's really dangerous and irresponsible to judge people by stereotypes.

Wee said...

Well, I'm going to answer question number one.
It’s not fair for anyone, no matter male or female, to be discriminated by stereotypical assumptions.
However, some of stereotypical assumptions are passed on by tradition, for example male should go out for jobs and female should stay indoors.
During ancient times, male were responsible for farming and female needed to take care of their husband and couldn’t ever go to school.
In nowadays, those impression have been changed in 21 century, female start to have their own jobs, also, they don't even think of marry.